I didn't say "Yes" but I certainly didn't say "No" either - a personal story

A very personal story....

I remember a sexual encounter from a very long time ago and I question it. I question from time to time whether I should have said something at the time, Yes, No, Maybe......But then it happened and my choice was made.

I didn't say "Yes" but I certainly didn't say "No" Either.....Was this his fault? NO, it was NOT!

I don't dwell on this one time event, however I do revisit from time to time (and cringe) wishing that I had made a different choice. But I didn't!

Does this make me a victim?.....Not in my opinion it doesn't. I was old enough to know the situation I was getting myself into and I was there willingly and participated in what was happening knowing full well what COULD transpire.....and it ultimately did.

Now, this is my personal story - we are all different and we might all hold this scenario in a different way, but for me at THAT moment I was at a fork in the road and a decision had to be made - the train was full steam ahead and putting on the breaks just wasn't in the cards, so to speak (for either of us). I was 50 % of the equation and I didn't say anything!

So how was he to know I was even contemplating what was happening?

Do I wish it didn't happen, Yes! But it did and I learned a personal lesson that probably helped me become the person I am today. I have learned to listen to my inner voice and to use it loud and clear Not just in this type of situation, but in many of life's choices.....

I have learned to pause at the fork in the road and decide which route is best for ME!

And I am okay with that!

Thank you for reading

Cultural Appropriation - I am struggling with this

DISCLAIMER FOR ALL THE POLITICALLY CORRECT SENSITIVE PEOPLE OUT THERE.


I am a human being on this planet, as are you. I have my personal beliefs and rightfully so. I love ALL people and honour them with the respect they (we) all deserve, no matter what life style they live. I have raised my children to have the same respect towards others, to love and care for this planet. I hold no ill will towards anyone of any kind. I also am respectful to those who have endured much pain and suffering at the hands of others; past, present and future. (Also might I add that I am not referring to cultural things like sacred traditions.) If the following blog offends you, then I guess it has done it's job. If it offends you then it means it stirred something inside you that you too are struggling with. I am writing this blog as I am struggling with Cultural Appropriation and it's blatant contradiction. Graciously, let me explain. (with a tad of satire)


Wikipedia definition of Cultural Appropriation:

"Cultural appropriation is the adoption or use of elements of one culture by members of a different culture. Cultural appropriation is seen by some as controversial, notably when elements of a minority culture are used by members of the cultural majority; this is seen as wrongfully oppressing the minority culture or stripping it of its group identity and intellectual property rights."


Things are getting so far out of control in my opinion I terms of everyone and everything having to be so Politically Correct. At what point are we going to get fed up with all this BS and just start being a Human Race and stop constantly making divisions between us all.


Here are a FEW key points that have brought me to my struggle around this. Remember to refer to my disclaimer if you start getting offended.


A teacher at a local school joined in on the fun one Halloween and dressed up as one of his favorite celebrities - Mr. T. !!! Harmless for the most part but his costume got him into trouble because he colored his face black (last I checked Mr. T IS black there for making his costume correct) He was not mocking the awful things that happened to a whole race, he was dressing up as a real life, living celebrity who happened to be African American. Would a mask of Mr.T's face have been more appropriate?


A University in Ottawa recently cancelled and banned a FREE Yoga class on campus in fear of Cultural Appropriation, where by the Yoga class would offend the ancient practice of Yoga or it would offend other student with different religious beliefs. How about those students that don't want to participate in the free Yoga class just opt out? This is a bright idea.


Jlo was labelled with Cultural Appropriation for her use of Ethnic attire for one of her performances as was Beyoncé a few months latter.


Famous designers DSquared are accused of the same thing. Their new 2016 Spring Collection is apparently not sensitive to the culture it was trying to portray in a rather beautiful way might I add.


So how far are we planning on taking this?


Should only Mexican restaurants prepare and serve Mexican foods? Or any other type of cuisine to treated the same? Isn't that Cultural Appropriation? Food is something very near and dear to each culture. Preparing foods and gathering around the table is right up there in importance with many cultures.  Should we not be able to enjoy these foods outside our own culture because it may offend an entire culture?


How about Kaityn Jenner? She was never a woman and never grew up or experienced the likes of gender inequality or the strife women have had to endure over the years? How is this not Cultural Appropriation? (refer to my disclaimer above) tough question isn't it?


Further more about costume Geisha's wear a white face???? Just putting that out there.


Halloween will be destined to only be about non denominational, not real or historical figures....Hey how about you be Barney this year? The big purple dinosaur! Thank God there aren't any Dinosaurs around to contest.


Why can't a teacher wear a factual costume?, Why can't we have FREE Yoga classes on University campuses? Why can't we appreciate and wear wonderful articles of clothing without the fear of offending?


All these things are beautiful, No? Why can't we appreciate them all as such. I don't want to be afraid of wearing something or doing something that might offend someone when it is NOT my intention to offend.


With all due respect,


If you are a transgender Mexican driving around in your Chevy eating Sushi for lunch and wearing a Sari, I am okay with that........


Namaste & Mazel tov

From one human being to another, thank you for reading.